Everyone is pumped up and pissed off, starting with director Bryan Singer, who reportedly kicked chairs and screamed at the crew. Who cares if X2 has a director, a writer or a thought in its head, as long as this $120 million epic turns loose mutants to metaphorically bruise our nether regions. It's like, OK, there's the credits, and now here's the ass-kicking, and it starts and doesn't stop and you're all like, 'Pants, meet **** " Props to Cumpston for wittily epitomizing the devalued state of film criticism. X-Men, the first film made from Stan Lee's Marvel comic, grossed $300 million in 2000, but Cumpston felt shortchanged: "Remember how the first film had all that story (= for gays) in the first part, and you were like, 'How 'bout some ass-kicking already?' and then finally they got to it? Not this one. The blurb is the work of fancifully named critic Neill Cumpston (as in cum stain?), whose review, as posted on the Ain't It Cool Web site, spoofs geek addiction to Xtc. The blurb is the work of fancifully named critic Neill Cumpston (as in cum stain?), whose review, as posted on the Ain't It Cool Web site, spoofs X2: X-Men United kicks you in the balls so hard that you puke on your balls and also your ass." Let's see the suits use that quote in the X2 ads. X2: X-Men United kicks you in the balls so hard that you puke on your balls and also your ass." Let's see the suits use that quote in the X2 ads.
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